I have been a faithful member of TOPS for four years. In that time I have managed to lose a few pounds but I have also gotten caught up in the trappings of the organization. By that I mean I volunteered to be an area captain, for several reasons, and while I did enjoy most of the experience I have resigned from that volunteer position. The expectations were high, my own and the organization's. I have always felt that if I am to commit to something I must meet all the requirements and I came to the realization that I would never be able to meet all the expectations that were part of that position. Not that the TOPS organization was complaining, they weren't. But I didn't feel I could accomplish what the position needed.
There is also the expectations of the weekly meetings. It isn't a matter of going and getting weighed, having a discussion about how to improve the next week. Our chapter spends a lot of time as a group. There is the annual 10 Km walk, which because of severe arthritis I haven't been able to participate in. There are the cute phrases, I've been a bad girl this week. For pete's sake we are all seniors so what is it with the bad girl phrase. Just because someone ate a piece of pie that doesn't make them a bad anything. Christmas parties are centred around food...a meal at a restaurant and a pot luck.
The conclusion that I have finally reached is that doing the same thing and expecting different results is a sign of insanity. I know that isn't original but it does apply to me and my weight loss/weight control efforts to date. Maybe giving myself time to feel good about who I am and what I am will go a long way to helping me control my weight. Gee you think?
2011 will be an exciting year. I am ready for new ideas, and new experiences. New books, new hobbies and new friends.Of course, there are many friends that I want to keep and that I hold very dear, they are important to me. It will be interesting to see how this new year unfolds.
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